Don't answer that question yet…
Thanksgiving night I was playing a game of Catch Phrase with my family. My sister had gotten the word “stubborn” and used me as part of her description for the word. “Jennifer is this…<big grin>”…. WHAT!? This coming from the self-proclaimed “princess” in the family? OH Yes, she did!
I was a little hurt. Sure, I'm bossy. I'm overly analytical. I'm also willing to admit that I'm particular about a lot of things. However, stubborn I am not. I not only budge, I bend probably more often than some may realize.
Stubborn as Defined by dictionary.com:
The definition of Stubborn according to merriam-webster.com:
a (1) : unreasonably or perversely unyielding : mulish (2) : justifiably unyielding : resolute b : suggestive or typical of a strong stubborn nature.
I'm going to go as far to say I am perversely unyielding in the fact that I won't agree that I'm stubborn. I have a strong nature, but not a stubborn one.
I'm a bit defensive about this, I agree, but not because I'm in denial. I think of stubborn as self centered, pigheaded and inconsiderate. All of which I am far from. I usually want things “my way” not because I need them that way for me, but because I'm a micro manager personality and I need to be able to know whats up from all angles. Unless you can give me a perspective of all angles OR I am confident you are going to handle you portions, I need it done my way. That's hardly from stubborn.
So now that I'm finished standing my ground – feel free to see if you can persuade me into agreeing.
Some more insight views of why one might think I'm stubborn:
I'm a perfectionist – Ya gotta do it right the first time, or don't bother doing it.
I'm selective and particular – when it comes to time and money, I like to spend mine very carefully… especially time.
I'm demanding – why settle for mediocre if you are capable of great?
I'm determined – you can't go very far with wishy-washy.
I'm protective – my kids come first, and if you don't stand up for yourself who else is going to?
I'm impatient – I need to work on this. I'm so busy trying to keep up with myself, I don't always allow the time for others to try to get involved.
I'm uptight – I'm constantly trying to make sure things are going right because I'm constantly worried I'm making someone made or someone doesn't like something I've done. It goes back to my being a perfectionist… I'm constantly trying to figure out how to make sure everyone is happy.
I'm an over thinker – I look at everything from 360 degrees, twice. This is a great attribute to have if you want to make a living as a sculptor… anything else and it can become bothersome and even a hindrance in progress.
I'm overly sensitive, maybe even paranoid – again always worried what others think so I'm always trying to make sure everything is just so.
I'm an Aries, in the Chinese zodiac I'm a rat and in numerology, I'm a 1. If you believe in any of these view points, that makes me born bossy, leadership-like, and everything else mentioned above. I don't like all of it and I can try to fight my own make up… but in the end, I am who I am, and as I get older I'm learning to be proud of whatever that is (that's the hardest part).
Looking at the list after writing down my thoughts, I think all those strong determined personality traits are why I've been able to be successfully self employed for so long. You have to be able to take a punch and still smile yet stand up for yourself when you need to if you're going to survive in the world of business owners.
There are a lot of things I am.. some better than others, but stubborn I am not.
1 thought on “I am not stubborn, or am I?”
I don’t think of stubborn in the dictionary definitions, I think of stubborn as meaning you stand your ground and believe in yourself. There are times when we are all stubborn, and times when we are not.
I agree with all the things you said you are… and sometimes you are stubborn, but in a very good way. So am I. But both of us listen to reason and will change *if* there is a good debate. Some things however I will probably always be stubborn about and no one can make me feel like that is a “bad” thing.